Don’t Tell Me It’s Just a Movie!

I was talking to my sister the other day about tv shows that we like.  I recommended Peaky Blinders to her, and she recommended The Walking Dead to me.  We did find some common ground though in the fact that we both get strongly attached to our favorite characters.  

Doesn’t matter if it’s a movie, tv show, or book, I get really emotionally invested with the story line and certain characters.  I mean, I know that is the intent of artistic endeavors, but I think my attachment goes beyond what would be considered normal.

For example, I watched all five seasons of Merlin on Netflix.  I did this two weeks ago and I’m still mourning the death of one of the main characters.  

Seriously, this has me messed up!  Randomly throughout my day, it will cross my mind, I’ll get sad, analyze the entire story line and try to figure out a way in which he could have lived.  

I got so upset with a book one time that I actually threw it across the room.  I almost threw my computer this past season of Peaky Blinders.  

Since the conversation with my sister, I’ve been mulling over why exactly this is.  Why am I so drastically impacted by movies, shows and books? Here’s what I came up with.

My idealistic nature.  I am a die hard idealist – love conquers all, good always wins, etc., etc.  Things are suppose to turn out a certain way for me. When it doesn’t, my world gets thrown off track, and I have to reassembling everything to fit back into my warped sense of how I look at the world.  (Wow, that felt deep writing that out. No wonder I’m depressed most of the time.)

I relate heavily to a certain character.  If I can see myself in the character, then I become the character.  So everything that happens to them, happens to me, and I feel it emotionally for days after I’ve finished watching or reading.  

If that character is me, then I want them to have their shit together and get everything they deserve.  If it doesn’t happen, then I’m forced to start questioning things in my own life.

Why aren’t these people real?  These are people I would love to hang out with or have as friends.  So when the movie/book is over, I’m upset that I won’t be “seeing” them again or learning anything more about them.  I need a grieving period to get through the loss.

The ultimate escape from reality.  Sometimes, it’s the environment or world created that gets to me.  If it’s somewhere better than where I am, I want to stay there.

Makes me feel something.  You know how when you are in a specific mood, be it happy or sad, there is the perfect movie for that, right?  So whatever emotion I’m feeling, I want to feel it deeply. Say I’m sad, and I just want to cry but I can’t. Excuse me?  Manchester By The Sea, help me out here!!

Makes me think.  Okay, so I’m a little twisted, because I just said what an idealist I am, but I also appreciate it, on another level, when a movie doesn’t turn out the way it should.  After the initial shock, it feels more real and gritty to me.  

Then I go into this over-analyzing mode where I’m examining every scene and situation, and trying to figure out what the author/director is trying to “say” about life in general.  These trips of feeling super-intellectual can last for days.

So, can anyone relate to what I’m talking about?  Are there any movies, shows or books that stay with you long after you’re done watching or reading?  Which ones and why? Leave a comment and share them with me.

If there are enough of you that can relate to this, I think a great future post would be a list of the top moments that really fucked me up.  

I don’t buy books, I adopt them.

Traci