She held her head as she looked at her bank balance one more time. “Why is there NEVER enough money each month? I’m always broke. Every time I think there will be a light at the end of the tunnel, something else comes up. I’m tired, I’m frustrated and I give up!”
She looked in the mirror and wanted to cry. “OMG, I am so ugly and fat. Why the hell can’t I just quit eating so much and work out? Why can’t I be consistent? I always fail. I’ll never look the way I want to. This is impossible.”
She ate lunch at her desk while she tried to get ahead by going through some more emails. “I’m so sick of working so hard and for what? Is this my life, really, working endless hours at a thankless job, always stressed? I’m going to be that person that just keels over at their desk one day.”
Did you relate to any of these women? Have you said some of those exact things before? Do you say them all the time?
I’m right there with you. I’ve said all of these things to myself at one time or another. I come up with plan after plan after plan to change some aspect of my life; my finances, my health, my career, and they have always failed.
But I’m realizing, more and more each day, that I was basically getting in my own way. Constantly talking to yourself with such a defeatist attitude does not attract what you want into your life. It actually attracts more of what you don’t want.
Whatever your thoughts are, that is what you manifest. I know this to be true, because once I finally switched the way I thought about things and the way I talked to myself and others about myself, things began to change for the better.
This doesn’t happen overnight. If you haven’t read my post on Controlling Negative Thoughts, I would start by incorporating some of the those suggestions into your life now.
Since implementing those tactics, I’m now in a more positive and empowered state and turning my focus to using visualization.
Celebrities, athletes and entrepreneurs all use this technique. Basically you picture yourself having accomplished your end goal and the steps that you take to get there. It can be applied to any type of goal you want to reach.
How to Use Visualization:
Visualize What Life Will Be Like Once You Achieve Your Goal
What is life going to be like when you are out of debt? What are you going to feel like when you are at your desired weight? What would be different about you if you had the job of your dreams?
Create your vision using very vivid details. For example, picture your bank account with a specific amount of money in it or see yourself sending in the last payment on a loan. How would that make you feel? Imagine having a car repair come up and not having to stress over where the money will come from to fix it.
For losing weight, picture yourself in a specific outfit. Imagine what it will feel like to take up less space when sitting down. See yourself feeling confident and smiling more.
For a new job, what will your business cards look like. Picture yourself actually receiving the promotion. What is your boss saying? How is your new office decorated?
Visualize The Steps You Will Have To Take To Reach Your Goal
After visualizing the outcome, then picture what it will feel like going through each step you need to take to get there. Again, make it as detailed as possible and also include visions of yourself handling obstacles and temptations.
See yourself saying no to an unnecessary purchase and feeling good about it because you know you are taking control of your finances. Picture your savings account growing as you stash money away little by little. Envision yourself cooking so you can save by not eating out.
As you lose weight, see yourself selecting a healthier option at a restaurant. Experience being sweaty, but satisfied after a hard workout. Watch as you step onto a scale and see the number coming up two pounds less than last week. Instead of being upset that it’s only two pounds, you are excited that you will never see those two pounds again.
At work, see yourself volunteering for a more demanding project. Picture the late nights you put in to make sure it’s perfect, not full of resentment, but pride because you know you are giving it your all. Picture yourself in meetings attentive and contributing something really useful to the conversation.
Create A Vision Board
Get posterboard and cut out words or pictures that represent aspects of the goal that you are trying to reach. Paste these onto the board and hang it somewhere you will see it everyday.
This visual will keep your goal at the forefront of your mind and assist you on your journey to consistently making choices that bring you closer to what you want.
Write It Down
There is a great book called Write It Down, Make It Happen by Henriette Anne Klauser. I highly recommend it to really grasp the concept of how writing goals down will help them to manifest.
The act of writing things down is another visual to help solidify in your mind what you are working towards, again, keeping you focused and consistent. It also makes your goal more real to you, because we tend to believe what we see in written word.
Create Smaller Goals
Depending on your overall goal, it might take a while to get there. You will need some smaller accomplishments to celebrate to keep you motivated and to avoid becoming frustrated that it isn’t happening fast enough.
If you are trying to lose weight, maybe a non-food reward after every five pounds lost. For a financial goal, something fun to celebrate $100 saved or another debt paid off. A celebratory glass of wine whenever you land a more demanding project or get a word of gratitude from your boss for a job well done.
Zone Out And Daydream
Whenever you have down time, (waiting in line, before you go to bed, etc.) zone out and daydream about your life and your goal. Meditation works for this as well. Once your mind settles and you are open to think more creatively and clearly, in my experience, this has lead to my goal becoming more defined and specific, or I’ve been able to come up with other ideas on how to reach it.
Do The Actual Work
Once you have your steps in place, begin immediately working those steps every single day. Consistently focus on reaching the next small goal, and then the next, and work your way through.
You will work harder because it is actually something really important to you. And you will feel empowered by making the daily decisions to get there.
Act It Out
This is my favorite part and the one that is my main focus right now. Think, talk, dress and act like you have already reached your goal. Actually embody the person you will be when your goal is accomplished. Emitting the right energy and attitude causes the universe to match what you are putting out.
If your goal is financial, stop talking about how broke you are. Let your talk and your demeanor reflect that you are a person who is financially sound. Don’t walk around frustrated and grumpy, walk around like you have everything under control.
If you are working on losing weight, do what you would do if you were already there. Stand taller, take better care of your skin, put on makeup, do your hair or dress in vivid colors.
If you are working on getting a promotion, dress for the job that you want. Go out of your way to greet the boss each morning. Be more pleasant to your co-workers and keep your desk tidier. Act like you are someone important and you will be.
All these things working together switch your mindset from being defeated and negative to optimistic and positive. Seems like a small thing, but trust me, it makes a world of difference in your life.
Go get it!